My Bitch. (possessive.)

Good Morning. I'm awake. I'm truly enjoying these past two weeks at home. They are coming to a close (I go back to the office Monday), so I better say I am enjoying them while they are technically still mine to enjoy.

When you ask someone to do something for you, and they reply with "What do I look like, your bitch?" What would happen if you replied "Well...as a matter of fact, yeah. You do sort of look like my bitch. After you're finished with (said endeavor), there are a few more assignments I need you to do before you run my bath." What would happen?

Because, see...I think I'm in need of a bitch. I have had the last two weeks "off". Yet, my house still isn't completely unpacked, I have a web site 1/2 ready to go live, I have several searches to plan, I have a buttload of marketing to do, we're opening a new office in another state, and I have kids.

A bitch would come in quite handy, I would think. And if I'm picking bitches with utilizable skills, I would like one who has some home decor sense. If my bitch could just come decorate my house with all the crap I've got laying around in boxes...maybe hang some curtains...that would make all the other jobs just a little more comfortable.

So, I'm taking applications. Hell, I'll even be nice and not CALL you my bitch. I'll call you my "Interior Designer".

Disclaimer: My bitch is NOT to be confused with my volunteers. Volunteers selflessly devote their time to the missing. I'm one of those too. My Volunteers are the heart and soul of my org. What I'm looking for is a bitch for ME.