Not Exactly Coyote Ugly...

First and foremost...thank you for all the kind words of hope and support for my marriage issues. I very much appreciate knowing that I can come here and be surrounded by friends who take the time to understand...and really that's exactly what we've built here over the past few months, huh? A big ole' group of friends? I'm absolutely loving it. Thank you.

So, the bar experience isn't exactly Coyote Ugly. Welllll...let me rephrase that. The bar itself isn't exactly Coyote Ugly, however some of the patrons could absolutely earn that compliment all on their own.

I had fun. A lot of fun, actually. Tonight was my first night of work. I made really decent money for hanging out at a bar for 4 hours, and it didn't suck at all. After I was done working, I ordered some fries and sat at the bar eating them. Two of my highest tipping customers swarmed in on me...while I was eating. Slurring in my face...you know how drunks do. Anyways, the one on the left of me reaches around and puts his arm around me. Now...keep in mind that dude has already asked me four seperate times if he'll have a chance to take me out. Each time, I show him my ring and explain that I'm married. So...now he's sitting next to me, breathing on my french (or do you prefer freedom?) fries and has slipped his hand down so that it rests on my ass.

I make a point of craning my neck around to look at his hand on my ass. I said "Would you prefer to remove your hand from my ass or for me to remove your hand from your arm?" LOL

I think that might severely deduct any future tips that dude might give me. I don't think he was a regular though...

On an upnote, Mr. DK went out looking for jobs all day today. Got a couple of good leads. He's got two interviews tomorrow, and I think I've got him coached on what to do when he gets there. His moping isn't going to cut it if he actually wants to be employed.

Instead of writing a comment on Cheryl's Blog: Hildebrand Road to her post regarding Sweetie Pie and trading his daddy in...I thought I'd just go ahead and brooch the subject here. Bop on over and read the post entitled "Dad" and when you're finished (and check out the rest of her blog too...she's a phenomenal writer) come on back and read this part of this post...

Cheryl...I've told you over and over again how it sounds like you're raising a great little man. The conversation with him that you shared with us just drives that point home 1000 fold. You're handling the situation the best way you could possibly. He has a strong relationship with you, with God and nothing, not even the harshness of his father will change that.

You never have to tell the kids what you really think of their other parental unit. You don't. Because they need to learn it for themselves, otherwise you risk contaminating their thoughts and their feelings with your own. And, that just breeds contempt that you're going to deal with down the road. SP (Sweetie Pie) already knows what his dad is. The key to dealing with it now (in my humble opinion) is that if the court says he has to go, he has to go, but encourage him to use all he knows about love and good and God when his dad is being harsh. What counts for him or at least what will count for him at the end of his childhood is that he was the best boy he could be during any and all circumstances that his father threw at him. If he can say that he did everything in his power to try to carry on his goodness, then its not his loss. It's his daddy's. Sooner or later, his daddy will learn that too, but if he's anything like my Ex, it will be in his late 80's as he's reflecting on what he should have done and could have done but didn't.

We have to just encourage them to be strong, not sway from their beliefs, to stand firm in their convictions, and that giving love doesn't always mean getting it back in return...no matter how hard we want it or try. It's a rough lesson for a 6 year old to learn. I know. I've been there, and now my oldest child (who you know is also 6) is there.

I think that your new poster (forgive me for being too lazy to go look up his name) has the right idea. Some kids are just lucky. They get their real daddy, their Creator AND a new daddy. When you meet that person...things will just fall into place and you'll know it.

Forgive me if I sound to "soap-boxish". I have some experience here. Surely our Ex's differ in a lot of ways, but it doesn't sound to me like they differ too terribly much.

And...of course we have that "great kid" thing in common!

Hugs.